From the BBC:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/from_our_own_correspondent/3720652.
stm


Every year an increasing number of American couples travel to China to
pick up their newly adopted children, and take them home to a new life
and family in the West.

I first noticed them in the hotel's lift.

Two of them in their late 30s I think, with a beautiful Chinese baby in
a papoose. The woman could not stop touching her child, patting her on
the head, stroking her face as we rode down from the 25th floor.

As her husband, whom she addressed as papa, looked on fondly, his gaze
was met by a wide-eyed stare from the youngster. Almost every time the
lift stopped another new family would join us. Conversations were always
the same.

"When did you get her?"

"Three days ago."

"Which province is she from? When is her birthday?"


Rest at the link.





steve

>Until the youngsters reach adulthood it will be hard to judge how they feel
about being taken away from their motherland at such an early age.<

At least for our family that remains the million dollar question.

Which is why every Sunday (with summers off) for the last four years I have
dragged my mostly unwilling daughter to Chinese School telling her "many
things in life are an option - this aint one of them".

As she continues to get older and become more aware of who she is and how
she came into our family, we're starting to get tiny little glimmers that
insisting on this has meaning. Just this year as she and I sit in er ban -
second grade - she is actually beginning to grasp the language. And as I
slog my way through learning more than how to ask where the loo is, I am
looked upon in our local Chinese community alternately as the greatest
oddity since crab rangoon or the example by which they shame their children
into studying harder.

But until she is grown no one will really know whether all of this was worth
it or not. Time will tell. It will come soon enough. Hard to believe she
has been in our family almost seven years already. In nine more years,
she'll be driving. Two years after that, college. And then....?

Names and faces change, but the story remains the same.

Enjoyed the link doctor. Thanks for sharing it.

fondly,

ducks

In article <41771274$0$68226$9a6e19ea@news.newshosting.com>,
"\(the\)duckster" <duckster@erinet.com> wrote:
Until the youngsters reach adulthood it will be hard to judge howthey feel about being taken away from their motherland at such anearly age.< At least for our family that remains the million dollar question. Which is why every Sunday (with summers off) for the last four years I have dragged my mostly unwilling daughter to Chinese School telling her "many things in life are an option - this aint one of them". As she continues to get older and become more aware of who she is and how she came into our family, we're starting to get tiny little glimmers that insisting on this has meaning. Just this year as she and I sit in er ban - second grade - she is actually beginning to grasp the language. And as I slog my way through learning more than how to ask where the loo is, I am looked upon in our local Chinese community alternately as the greatest oddity since crab rangoon or the example by which they shame their children into studying harder. But until she is grown no one will really know whether all of this was worth it or not. Time will tell. It will come soon enough. Hard to believe she has been in our family almost seven years already. In nine more years, she'll be driving. Two years after that, college. And then....? Names and faces change, but the story remains the same. Enjoyed the link doctor. Thanks for sharing it. fondly, ducks



You're welcome! We face this as well -- what will she think when she's
grown. Obviously we don't have the foreign adoption angle, but it's an
issue. And we're halfway there.




steve

In article <41771274$0$68226$9a6e19ea@news.newshosting.com>,As she continues to get older and become more aware of who she is and howshe came into our family, we're starting to get tiny little glimmers thatinsisting on this has meaning.

Congrats on seeing a glimmer. We're still in the total "I DON'T WANT TO
GO TO CHINESE SCHOOL" mode. I like your many things in life are optional
quote. I hereby ask permission to use.
looked upon in our local Chinese community alternately as the greatestoddity since crab rangoon or the example by which they shame their childreninto studying harder.

Our Chinese school has a class for kids who don't live in Chinese speaking
kids. You go into the total immersion route? I am impressed.




But until she is grown no one will really know whether all of this was worthit or not. Time will tell. It will come soon enough.

I've talked to several parents of kids adopted from Korea. To a (wo)man
they say that language/culture classes are a must. It comes in
particularly handy during adolescence as kids are trying to establish an
idendity. When they're college age, they might actually express some
appreciation. (I am not holding my breath.)
Enjoyed the link doctor. Thanks for sharing it.


Likewise I'm sure. Most business people who travel to southern China call
the famous White Swan hotel, the White Stork.


Linda

"Steve White" <steve@spam.me.never> wrote in message news:steve-> You're welcome! We face this as well -- what will she think when she's grown. Obviously we don't have the foreign adoption angle, but it's an issue. And we're halfway there.

It's true..Who am I, where did I come from and "why didn't she need me?" was
a recent one.

Where have the years gone already? Seems like yesterday they were just
chubby little toddlers. Today, they are the undisputed authorities on most
subjects.

Stay well.

ducks steve

"Linda Fortney" <lfortney@dc.umd.edu> wrote in message
news:cl8qbo$4pl@holmes.umd.edu... In article <41771274$0$68226$9a6e19ea@news.newshosting.com>,As she continues to get older and become more aware of who she is and howshe came into our family, we're starting to get tiny little glimmers thatinsisting on this has meaning. Congrats on seeing a glimmer. We're still in the total "I DON'T WANT TO GO TO CHINESE SCHOOL" mode. I like your many things in life are optional quote. I hereby ask permission to use.

Granted. I deliver it firmly, hairy eyeball in place over half glasses.

Our Chinese school has a class for kids who don't live in Chinese speaking kids. You go into the total immersion route? I am impressed.

With the exception of the bunny class, it's not much of an option. The
school here is run by Chinese so, chinese it is. On Sunday, too, from 1:30
to 5:00.

Fortunately, this year's laoshi is a doctoral engineering student with good
english skills, so if we really get in a mushy muddle over the finer points
of a phrase, we can fall back on whatever translates into English. I'm just
at survival Chinese myself so it can make for a pretty amusing discussion. >

But until she is grown no one will really know whether all of this was
worthit or not. Time will tell. It will come soon enough. I've talked to several parents of kids adopted from Korea. To a (wo)man they say that language/culture classes are a must. It comes in particularly handy during adolescence as kids are trying to establish an idendity. When they're college age, they might actually express some appreciation. (I am not holding my breath.)

Nor am I, but no one will ever fault me for not giving it all I have to keep
her exposed.Enjoyed the link doctor. Thanks for sharing it. Likewise I'm sure. Most business people who travel to southern China call the famous White Swan hotel, the White Stork.

The site of the uninitiated and unknowing business traveler landing squarely
in the middle of Romper Room Guangzhou style still cracks me up after all
these years.

ducks

(the)duckster wrote:
"Steve White" <steve@spam.me.never> wrote in message news:steve->You're welcome! We face this as well -- what will she think when she'sgrown. Obviously we don't have the foreign adoption angle, but it's anissue. And we're halfway there.steve

It's true..Who am I, where did I come from and "why didn't she need me?" was a recent one.

That will always shatter my heart in a million pieces. You know how I
feel about generalizations, but it surely does seem to be a world wide
phenomenon among those adopted as infants and toddlers..."How could
she throw me away?" and "...what did I do to make her/them not want me?"
Where have the years gone already? Seems like yesterday they were just chubby little toddlers. Today, they are the undisputed authorities on most subjects. Stay well. ducks


Well...at least until she turns 21, eh? ;-) Which reminds me...have you
heard yet that 30 is the new 21? Y'all get ready for those 20 something
post adolescents who hand around home till you ask for their keys! :-)

I'm totally in shock as I realize that my eldest granddaughter will be
21 next February, and the next in line turns 18 in January! Seems I
barely blinked and the Barbies were gone, replaced by the captain of
the football team!

I think of you and CR often...have a cute Golden art piece for you...
will send it via email this weekend...also have some exquisite Chinese
art pieces -- interested? Thanks for being you, ducks.

Patty

"pb..." <woodlark-99@newsguy.com> wrote in message
news:clcun802fik@news2.newsguy.com...
That will always shatter my heart in a million pieces. You know how I feel about generalizations, but it surely does seem to be a world wide phenomenon among those adopted as infants and toddlers..."How could she throw me away?" and "...what did I do to make her/them not want me?"

For my daughter it was one of the first questions she asked, once she got
past not believing that that she grew in someone else tummy. Though I have
to say how it touched me when being told that while "she didn't grow in my
tummy, she did grow in my heart" responded by wondering "if I grew in your
heart, how did you bend over?"
Well...at least until she turns 21, eh? ;-) Which reminds me...have you heard yet that 30 is the new 21?

Yeh and 50 is the new 30. Tell that to my hot flashes.

Y'all get ready for those 20 something post adolescents who hand around home till you ask for their keys! :-)

I'm starting to feel like Rupa. I don't want her to ever leave.
I'm totally in shock as I realize that my eldest granddaughter will be 21 next February, and the next in line turns 18 in January! Seems I barely blinked and the Barbies were gone, replaced by the captain of the football team!

Got friends with kids that age who laugh at me over my tales with a seven
year old. Hell all it seems I do is drive. I think of you and CR often...have a cute Golden art piece for you... will send it via email this weekend...also have some exquisite Chinese art pieces -- interested?

I'm always happy to receive things from you Patti. It pleases me greatly
that we are friends.

Thanks for being you, ducks.

Back atcha. Hows your Bailey pooch, btw? Got a border collie/shepherd mix
that's 17 and still kickin. Can't hear for squat but if you throw the
frisbee just right, she snatch it right out of the air. The two boys have
to work to keep up with her. I have a really cute pic of CRK and her beasts
in their matching squall jackets if you want to shoot me a email address I
can send it to.

fondly,

ducks Patty