LilMtnCbn
10-06-2004, 06:36 AM
http://www.dailypress.com/news/columnists/dp-92033cm0oct06,0,6385682.colum
n?coll=dp-news-columnists
Daughter searches for birth mother
Published October 6 2004
Wil LaVeist
Thirty-five years ago today a newborn touched her young mother for the last
time. The baby was born in the old Whitaker Memorial Hospital in Newport News.
Only 4 pounds, 14 ounces, she was just a little thing. But she was a fighter
and determined to live on. Only, it would have to be without her birth mother.
The baby was put up for adoption and placed in foster care.
That same year at Langley Air Force Base Hospital another mother parted with
her newborn, but under different circumstances. Shirley and Wallace W. Smith's
son died after he was born prematurely. The boy was the couple's first child.
Wallace was in the Air Force. As he and his wife mourned, his commanding
officer suggested they adopt a child. Shirley resisted at first, but Wallace
persisted. Shirley is glad he did.
The Smiths went to the state adoption office in Hampton to begin the process.
After awhile they were marveling at a smiling 10-pound girl with Milk Dud eyes.
"Man, she was happy and beautiful," Wallace said. "Those big brown eyes peeked
out at you."
The adoption became final in December 1970. As time passed, the Smiths
resettled in Columbia, S.C. Shirley became pregnant again and gave birth to a
daughter. At the advice of a pediatrician, the Smiths told their first daughter
that she was adopted. That's when the fight in the little girl really began to
come through.
"I cannot remember how many times my wife and I had to go to the elementary
school because of her getting into fights," Wallace said. "She got teased a lot
for being adopted."
The little girl was angry. She kept her emotions inside and her thoughts to
herself. She wanted to know why her mother and father apparently didn't want
her. She wanted to know who she was.
The little girl eventually grew up and mellowed out. She graduated from high
school, then college. She moved to Atlanta and now has a great job handling
computer systems. She has many friends and a great relationship with her
family. The pretty little girl has become a beautiful, mature woman.
But the baby within still wants to know her birth mother. And it's especially
important now that the mother who held her when she needed it most is dying of
terminal cancer.
So with her adoptive mother's encouragement and father's help, the woman -
Cecelia B. Smith - in 1998 set out to find her birth mother. The mother who
gave her away but also apparently named her.
An estimated 127,000 adoptions occur nationally, 2,200 of them in Virginia.
Many eventually seek out their birth parents.
Wallace contacted the Virginia Department of Social Services offices in
Richmond and Hampton. Using her computer expertise, Cecelia did Internet
searches. They learned that Cecelia's birth father used to work in the shipyard
and that he likely died in 1994. They believe her birth mother is still living
in Hampton, though they aren't quite sure who she is.
"Over the years, she's felt like, why wouldn't somebody want her," Wallace said
of his daughter. "I have a brother who adopted a girl and she found her birth
mother and they have a good relationship. My daughter wonders why she can't
have that."
Cecelia says she's not angry. She just wants to know who her birth mother is.
She just wants to know who Cecelia really is.
"My sister looks like my mom and acts like my dad," Cecelia said. "But me, I
don't know who I look or act like.
"She (her birth mother) might be thinking I'm mad," Cecelia continued. "I'm not
mad. I live a good life. My parents are wonderful. I'm just a person who wants
closure in her life. It would be nice if we could be friends, but if not, I'm
OK with it. I just want to reach out and touch her. Or if someone knows her
they will respond."
Thirty-five years ago today Cecelia was born in the old Whitaker Memorial
Hospital. It happened at 7:30 p.m. What a touching birthday present a phone
call today would be
-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown
n?coll=dp-news-columnists
Daughter searches for birth mother
Published October 6 2004
Wil LaVeist
Thirty-five years ago today a newborn touched her young mother for the last
time. The baby was born in the old Whitaker Memorial Hospital in Newport News.
Only 4 pounds, 14 ounces, she was just a little thing. But she was a fighter
and determined to live on. Only, it would have to be without her birth mother.
The baby was put up for adoption and placed in foster care.
That same year at Langley Air Force Base Hospital another mother parted with
her newborn, but under different circumstances. Shirley and Wallace W. Smith's
son died after he was born prematurely. The boy was the couple's first child.
Wallace was in the Air Force. As he and his wife mourned, his commanding
officer suggested they adopt a child. Shirley resisted at first, but Wallace
persisted. Shirley is glad he did.
The Smiths went to the state adoption office in Hampton to begin the process.
After awhile they were marveling at a smiling 10-pound girl with Milk Dud eyes.
"Man, she was happy and beautiful," Wallace said. "Those big brown eyes peeked
out at you."
The adoption became final in December 1970. As time passed, the Smiths
resettled in Columbia, S.C. Shirley became pregnant again and gave birth to a
daughter. At the advice of a pediatrician, the Smiths told their first daughter
that she was adopted. That's when the fight in the little girl really began to
come through.
"I cannot remember how many times my wife and I had to go to the elementary
school because of her getting into fights," Wallace said. "She got teased a lot
for being adopted."
The little girl was angry. She kept her emotions inside and her thoughts to
herself. She wanted to know why her mother and father apparently didn't want
her. She wanted to know who she was.
The little girl eventually grew up and mellowed out. She graduated from high
school, then college. She moved to Atlanta and now has a great job handling
computer systems. She has many friends and a great relationship with her
family. The pretty little girl has become a beautiful, mature woman.
But the baby within still wants to know her birth mother. And it's especially
important now that the mother who held her when she needed it most is dying of
terminal cancer.
So with her adoptive mother's encouragement and father's help, the woman -
Cecelia B. Smith - in 1998 set out to find her birth mother. The mother who
gave her away but also apparently named her.
An estimated 127,000 adoptions occur nationally, 2,200 of them in Virginia.
Many eventually seek out their birth parents.
Wallace contacted the Virginia Department of Social Services offices in
Richmond and Hampton. Using her computer expertise, Cecelia did Internet
searches. They learned that Cecelia's birth father used to work in the shipyard
and that he likely died in 1994. They believe her birth mother is still living
in Hampton, though they aren't quite sure who she is.
"Over the years, she's felt like, why wouldn't somebody want her," Wallace said
of his daughter. "I have a brother who adopted a girl and she found her birth
mother and they have a good relationship. My daughter wonders why she can't
have that."
Cecelia says she's not angry. She just wants to know who her birth mother is.
She just wants to know who Cecelia really is.
"My sister looks like my mom and acts like my dad," Cecelia said. "But me, I
don't know who I look or act like.
"She (her birth mother) might be thinking I'm mad," Cecelia continued. "I'm not
mad. I live a good life. My parents are wonderful. I'm just a person who wants
closure in her life. It would be nice if we could be friends, but if not, I'm
OK with it. I just want to reach out and touch her. Or if someone knows her
they will respond."
Thirty-five years ago today Cecelia was born in the old Whitaker Memorial
Hospital. It happened at 7:30 p.m. What a touching birthday present a phone
call today would be
-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown
