About seven years ago I had a relationship with a woman that ended just after
she got pregnant. She had claimed she was using birth control but of course
she was not. The decision to end the relationship was hers: she wanted to
raise the child independently of me. A few weeks after the end of the
relationship she called to tell me that she had miscarried, and then she moved
to the West Coast where she had a "premature" baby about 7 months later.

She had a boyfriend there at that time and proclaimed him the legal father and
sent out birth announcements about the "premature" birth that named him as
such.

The baby was supposedly born two months prematurely and weighed 5 pounds 14
ounces at birth. At the time I believed her claim and simply sadly went on to
look for another relationship.

It is now 7 years later and she has broken up with the "father" who she never
married and she is now claiming that *I* am the father and wants me to submit
to paternity testing for child support purposes. I believe I probably *AM*
the father after doing a bit of research on miscarriages, pre term births, and
average birth weights. However, at THIS point in my life, after being denied
the ability to help raise my possible child, being in a situation where I'm
already just living paycheck to paycheck, and faced with the fact that I
would virtually and maybe literally never see him (neither the mom nor I have
much money, and there's 3,000 miles between) I do not look forward to paying
child support.

Can I be forced to? Or did her earlier claims and denial of my paternity free
me from that obligation? Does anyone have any good suggestions as to where I
could go for more information before actually possibly spending thousands of
dollars on lawyers that I might not need and would have a hard time affording?

Thanx to any who can help!

George. (GeorgeB1979@aol.com)

George,

An ex girlfriend wishes to have you submit a sample for testing to
establish paternity. You want to know if you can be compelled to comply. The
short answer is yes. There is nothing in your story that relieves you of the
obligations to this child if it yours. The test should be paid for by the
mother since you have grounds to doubt her claim. If you are in fact the
father you should get an attorney to help you deal with all of the matters
that will arise e.g. visitation, child support, et c.

Good luck,
Dave M.

On Mon, 05 Jan 2004 08:15:38 -0500, GeorgeB1979 <georgeb1979@aol.com> wrote: About seven years ago I had a relationship with a woman that ended just after she got pregnant. She had claimed she was using birth control but of course she was not. The decision to end the relationship was hers: she wanted to raise the child independently of me. A few weeks after the end of the relationship she called to tell me that she had miscarried, and then she moved to the West Coast where she had a "premature" baby about 7 months later. She had a boyfriend there at that time and proclaimed him the legal father and sent out birth announcements about the "premature" birth that named him as such. The baby was supposedly born two months prematurely and weighed 5 pounds 14 ounces at birth. At the time I believed her claim and simply sadly went on to look for another relationship. It is now 7 years later and she has broken up with the "father" who she never married and she is now claiming that *I* am the father and wants me to submit to paternity testing for child support purposes. I believe I probably *AM* the father after doing a bit of research on miscarriages, pre term births, and average birth weights. However, at THIS point in my life, after being denied the ability to help raise my possible child, being in a situation where I'm already just living paycheck to paycheck, and faced with the fact that I would virtually and maybe literally never see him (neither the mom nor I have much money, and there's 3,000 miles between) I do not look forward to paying child support. Can I be forced to? Or did her earlier claims and denial of my paternity free me from that obligation? Does anyone have any good suggestions as to where I

Obviously this is going to depend on the law in your state, but I would be
quite surprised if her denials would affect your future responsibility to pay
child support. Most likely, if you are the biological parent, you are going
to be held responsible. It's particularly likely if the alternative is that
the state will have to provide support in your stead. But you need an
opinion based on the law in your state. This post is not legal advice.

A more interesting question would be presented if someone were attempting
to terminate your paternal rights against your will. In that case, the
mother's actions might be highly relevant. Of course it doesn't sound like
that's the case for you. Ah well.

Isaac

georgeb1979@aol.com (GeorgeB1979) wrote in message
news:<cpoivvo0tfnpr9p069ceuvbhu09cgv70b6@4ax.com>... About seven years ago I had a relationship with a woman that ended just after she got pregnant. She had claimed she was using birth control but of course she was not. The decision to end the relationship was hers: she wanted to raise the child independently of me. A few weeks after the end of the relationship she called to tell me that she had miscarried, and then she moved to the West Coast where she had a "premature" baby about 7 months later. She had a boyfriend there at that time and proclaimed him the legal father and sent out birth announcements about the "premature" birth that named him as such. The baby was supposedly born two months prematurely and weighed 5 pounds 14 ounces at birth. At the time I believed her claim and simply sadly went on to look for another relationship. It is now 7 years later and she has broken up with the "father" who she never married and she is now claiming that *I* am the father and wants me to submit to paternity testing for child support purposes. I believe I probably *AM* the father after doing a bit of research on miscarriages, pre term births, and average birth weights. However, at THIS point in my life, after being denied the ability to help raise my possible child, being in a situation where I'm already just living paycheck to paycheck, and faced with the fact that I would virtually and maybe literally never see him (neither the mom nor I have much money, and there's 3,000 miles between) I do not look forward to paying child support. Can I be forced to? Or did her earlier claims and denial of my paternity free me from that obligation? Does anyone have any good suggestions as to where I could go for more information before actually possibly spending thousands of dollars on lawyers that I might not need and would have a hard time affording? Thanx to any who can help! George. (GeorgeB1979@aol.com)

"Might not need" a lawyer could be wishful thinking. If she retains a
lawyer and decides to press the issue, you could get an abrupt and
costly lesson in unequal combat.

Six or seven years is an awfully long time to sleep on a mistaken
declaration of paternity. If the West Coast boyfriend declared
paternity voluntarily, there is generally a much shorter period (60
days in California, if I read correctly) during which he could rescind
it, and a relatively short period (2 years in California?) during
which they could decide it was a mistake and look elsewhere for the
father. The longer they wait, the more conclusive it looks.

But there is also the possibility that the court will overlook the
long delay, particularly if she were armed with evidence that the West
Coast boyfriend is not the father and her lawyer were to present a
case at equity or a case "in the interest of justice", to void the old
declaration and order genetic testing.

--
Not a lawyer,

Chris Green

On 6/1/04 14:51, in article 3oilvv4ot8r4fc68t2ks8p4snm3ma0ujm8@4ax.com,
"Christopher Green" <cj.green@worldnet.att.net> wrote:
But there is also the possibility that the court will overlook the long delay, particularly if she were armed with evidence that the West Coast boyfriend is not the father and her lawyer were to present a case at equity or a case "in the interest of justice", to void the old declaration and order genetic testing.

Good point. Unless there has been a formal finding of paternity, the
inquirer could be stuck. I have heard of cases where back child support was
ordered for all the years from zero to late teens.

There are several online help groups you might link up with:
fathersrc.com/
www.childsupport.cc/

Do a Google search for "child support + fathers"

Sadly, liability for child support has little relationship to access or
custody.