LilMtnCbn
05-20-2004, 06:43 AM
http://www.glossynews.com/artman/publish/white-baby-black-market-705.shtml
White Baby Black Market Softens
By Brendan Alexander
May 20, 2004, 02:20
Two dollars? Oh come on man, that's weak! You could get more just by parting me
out!
While many international sectors are enjoying recovery, others are not fairing
as well. It's no surprise Nigerian e-fraud is down 80%, but what did surprise
me was the softening of black market adoptions.
To verify this, we went undercover in Shanghai, one of the largest cities in
the world. Posing as a father with a white baby, me and Dad hit the streets. We
were worried that no one would believe I was a baby, but the people played
right into it.
Most Chinese have seen some white people, with as much as half a percent white
population in major cities. What they haven't seen is a white baby, since
there's fewer than a couple hundred in circulation at any given time. Compare
that to the 2 billion Asians they see and you'll start to fathom my rarity.
The locals ate me up like the baby tiger exhibit at the zoo. Everyone wants to
oogle me, more than usual even. Many want their picture taken with me. What can
I say, like David Hasslehoff, I'm a lot bigger in Asia.
Then the bidding started. I have to say I expected more. There's always been so
much talk about how valuable I'd be on the black market, and with the attention
I got I figured it would be promising, but it was lackluster at best. This
market has really seen a downturn.
Bidding opened at 37 cents. Not a very impressive start. After ten minutes of
haggling, squeezing the footies and seeing what a cheerful disposition I
maintain, it only got up to two bucks and change. Two dollars for a boy this
handsome? You must be mad! (I know I was.)
Not finding a suitable buyer we gave up and went home. Investors, my advice is
to keep your money in stocks for now and wait until buying and selling babies
becomes profitable again.
-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown
White Baby Black Market Softens
By Brendan Alexander
May 20, 2004, 02:20
Two dollars? Oh come on man, that's weak! You could get more just by parting me
out!
While many international sectors are enjoying recovery, others are not fairing
as well. It's no surprise Nigerian e-fraud is down 80%, but what did surprise
me was the softening of black market adoptions.
To verify this, we went undercover in Shanghai, one of the largest cities in
the world. Posing as a father with a white baby, me and Dad hit the streets. We
were worried that no one would believe I was a baby, but the people played
right into it.
Most Chinese have seen some white people, with as much as half a percent white
population in major cities. What they haven't seen is a white baby, since
there's fewer than a couple hundred in circulation at any given time. Compare
that to the 2 billion Asians they see and you'll start to fathom my rarity.
The locals ate me up like the baby tiger exhibit at the zoo. Everyone wants to
oogle me, more than usual even. Many want their picture taken with me. What can
I say, like David Hasslehoff, I'm a lot bigger in Asia.
Then the bidding started. I have to say I expected more. There's always been so
much talk about how valuable I'd be on the black market, and with the attention
I got I figured it would be promising, but it was lackluster at best. This
market has really seen a downturn.
Bidding opened at 37 cents. Not a very impressive start. After ten minutes of
haggling, squeezing the footies and seeing what a cheerful disposition I
maintain, it only got up to two bucks and change. Two dollars for a boy this
handsome? You must be mad! (I know I was.)
Not finding a suitable buyer we gave up and went home. Investors, my advice is
to keep your money in stocks for now and wait until buying and selling babies
becomes profitable again.
-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown
