An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhood
effects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never be used
by adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family is
struggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five years
old from foster care.

I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.

Dad


http://specialchildren.about.com/cs/radattachment/l/blloveisnot.htm

Love Isn't Enough

Reactive Attachment Disorder in Infancy and Early Childhood is a diagnosis used
to describe the symptoms of children who have endured severe neglect. Neglect
is defined as a disregard for the child's basic emotional needs for comfort,
stimulation, and affection. Multiple primary caregivers make it virtually
impossible to develop stable attachments. The affects can be devastating to the
child.

Bonding begins at birth. It encompasses the cycle of needs and having those
needs met by a loving parent or caretaker. It's a cycle that is repeated a
hundred times a day. An infant feels hunger, pain, or discomfort, thus crying
out to have his needs met. In a healthy environment, the responsive parent will
hold their infant, comfort him, and meet his needs. The child learns to trust;
finding the world predictable and safe.

The child who does not have his needs met, looks within himself, abruptly
learning that the world is frightening and unpredictable. The bond is broken,
the ability to trust is shattered.

Can love for a child bring distress and pain to the child? Is it impossible for
a child to become attached in a way that allows for intimacy in relationships?
Have you met the child who will pay more attention to a stranger than show
affection towards his/her parents? Superficial and charming become frightening
descriptions of children diagnosed with RAD. Dreams are crushed as your home
becomes a battleground.

Newspaper headlines are telling the horror stories of adoptive families who
have murdered their children. The family’s defense; Reactive Attachment
Disorder. A disorder that can create such chaos in the child that the family is
no longer able to cope with the stress or burden placed on them. One such
family was promptly arrested and charged with child abuse, before they could
leave their flight in New York. Officials removed their newly adopted four year
old daughters (from Russia) right there on the airplane. Supporters for the
family are stating that the girls are attachment disordered. Recently, an
adoptive mother has been charged with allegedly attempting to sell her adopted
daughter on the Internet. Once more, the defense places responsibility of the
mother's actions on the fact that the daughter has an attachment disorder.

Symptoms and Behaviors associated with R. A. D.

Superficially engaging and charming.
Lack of eye contact on parental terms.
Indiscriminately affectionate with strangers.
Not affectionate on parents' terms(not cuddly).
Destructive to self, others and material things(accident
prone).
Cruelty to animals.
Stealing.
Lying about the obvious(crazy lying).
No impulse controls (frequently acts hyperactive).
Learning lags.
Lack of cause and effect thinking.
Lack of conscience.
Abnormal eating patterns.
Poor peer relationships.
Preoccupation with fire.
Persistent nonsense questions and incessant chatter.
Inappropriately demanding and clingy.
Abnormal speech patterns.
Where to Seek Help and Guidance

Treatment plans are available for children and families. One such therapy is
holding therapy. Holding therapy involves forcibly holding the child by a
qualified therapist who incites the child to rage. According to proponents of
this type of therapy, this allows the child to acknowledge his/her rage, which
is the key to the healing process. This particular therapy has been both
praised and criticized as being too invasive to a child. Residential treatment
is another option for families, one that I have personally chosen for my son,
who suffers from a severe attachment disorder.

Available Resources

As the parent of children diagnosed with RAD, I do know first hand about the
violence and devastation that is symptomatic of Reactive Attachment Disorder. I
am available to answer your questions. Most importantly, I am here to offer
support and friendship. You will find resources available to you in our library
devoted to Attachment Disorders.

Please don't hesitate to contact me.

specialchildren.guide@about.com

Previous Features

In article <20040512213422.23382.00001344@mb-m14.aol.com>,
adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad) wrote:
An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhood effects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never be used by adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family is struggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five years old from foster care. I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride. Dad http://specialchildren.about.com/cs/radattachment/l/blloveisnot.htm Love Isn't Enough Reactive Attachment Disorder in Infancy and Early Childhood is a diagnosis used to describe the symptoms of children who have endured severe neglect. Neglect is defined as a disregard for the child's basic emotional needs for comfort, stimulation, and affection. Multiple primary caregivers make it virtually impossible to develop stable attachments. The affects can be devastating to the child.




Excellent post, Dad. Thanks for the pointer. Learned something new.




steve

In article <20040512213422.23382.00001344@mb-m14.aol.com>,
adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad) wrote:
An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhood effects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never be used by adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family is struggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five years old from foster care. I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride. Dad http://specialchildren.about.com/cs/radattachment/l/blloveisnot.htm Love Isn't Enough Reactive Attachment Disorder in Infancy and Early Childhood is a diagnosis used to describe the symptoms of children who have endured severe neglect. Neglect is defined as a disregard for the child's basic emotional needs for comfort, stimulation, and affection. Multiple primary caregivers make it virtually impossible to develop stable attachments. The affects can be devastating to the child.




Excellent post, Dad. Thanks for the pointer. Learned something new.




steve

>Subject: When Love Isn't EnoughFrom: adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad)Date: 5/12/2004 7:34 PM Mountain Standard TimeMessage-id: <20040512213422.23382.00001344@mb-m14.aol.com>An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhoodeffects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never beusedby adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family isstruggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five yearsold from foster care.I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Thanks for posting it. ((((Dad's family))))


-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown

>Subject: When Love Isn't EnoughFrom: adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad)Date: 5/12/2004 7:34 PM Mountain Standard TimeMessage-id: <20040512213422.23382.00001344@mb-m14.aol.com>An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhoodeffects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never beusedby adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family isstruggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five yearsold from foster care.I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Thanks for posting it. ((((Dad's family))))


-------------------------
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will
be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!"
-----Unknown

>An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhoodeffects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never beusedby adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family isstruggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five yearsold from foster care.I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Sorry to hear it, Dad. The best to you and your family.

J.



Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

>An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhoodeffects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never beusedby adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family isstruggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five yearsold from foster care.I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Sorry to hear it, Dad. The best to you and your family.

J.



Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

>Subject: When Love Isn't EnoughFrom: adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad)Date: 5/12/2004
I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Hugs, Dad. Kathy J

>Subject: When Love Isn't EnoughFrom: adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad)Date: 5/12/2004
I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride.Dad

Hugs, Dad. Kathy J

AdoptaDad wrote: An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhood effects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never be used by adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family is struggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five years old from foster care. I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride. Dad

((((((((Dad))))))))

Hang on and hold tight...know you're in my thoughts.

pb...

http://specialchildren.about.com/cs/radattachment/l/blloveisnot.htm Love Isn't Enough Reactive Attachment Disorder in Infancy and Early Childhood is a diagnosis used to describe the symptoms of children who have endured severe neglect. Neglect is defined as a disregard for the child's basic emotional needs for comfort, stimulation, and affection. Multiple primary caregivers make it virtually impossible to develop stable attachments. The affects can be devastating to the child. Bonding begins at birth. It encompasses the cycle of needs and having those needs met by a loving parent or caretaker. It's a cycle that is repeated a hundred times a day. An infant feels hunger, pain, or discomfort, thus crying out to have his needs met. In a healthy environment, the responsive parent will hold their infant, comfort him, and meet his needs. The child learns to trust; finding the world predictable and safe. The child who does not have his needs met, looks within himself, abruptly learning that the world is frightening and unpredictable. The bond is broken, the ability to trust is shattered. Can love for a child bring distress and pain to the child? Is it impossible for a child to become attached in a way that allows for intimacy in relationships? Have you met the child who will pay more attention to a stranger than show affection towards his/her parents? Superficial and charming become frightening descriptions of children diagnosed with RAD. Dreams are crushed as your home becomes a battleground. Newspaper headlines are telling the horror stories of adoptive families who have murdered their children. The family’s defense; Reactive Attachment Disorder. A disorder that can create such chaos in the child that the family is no longer able to cope with the stress or burden placed on them. One such family was promptly arrested and charged with child abuse, before they could leave their flight in New York. Officials removed their newly adopted four year old daughters (from Russia) right there on the airplane. Supporters for the family are stating that the girls are attachment disordered. Recently, an adoptive mother has been charged with allegedly attempting to sell her adopted daughter on the Internet. Once more, the defense places responsibility of the mother's actions on the fact that the daughter has an attachment disorder. Symptoms and Behaviors associated with R. A. D. Superficially engaging and charming. Lack of eye contact on parental terms. Indiscriminately affectionate with strangers. Not affectionate on parents' terms(not cuddly). Destructive to self, others and material things(accident prone). Cruelty to animals. Stealing. Lying about the obvious(crazy lying). No impulse controls (frequently acts hyperactive). Learning lags. Lack of cause and effect thinking. Lack of conscience. Abnormal eating patterns. Poor peer relationships. Preoccupation with fire. Persistent nonsense questions and incessant chatter. Inappropriately demanding and clingy. Abnormal speech patterns. Where to Seek Help and Guidance Treatment plans are available for children and families. One such therapy is holding therapy. Holding therapy involves forcibly holding the child by a qualified therapist who incites the child to rage. According to proponents of this type of therapy, this allows the child to acknowledge his/her rage, which is the key to the healing process. This particular therapy has been both praised and criticized as being too invasive to a child. Residential treatment is another option for families, one that I have personally chosen for my son, who suffers from a severe attachment disorder. Available Resources As the parent of children diagnosed with RAD, I do know first hand about the violence and devastation that is symptomatic of Reactive Attachment Disorder. I am available to answer your questions. Most importantly, I am here to offer support and friendship. You will find resources available to you in our library devoted to Attachment Disorders. Please don't hesitate to contact me. specialchildren.guide@about.com Previous Features

AdoptaDad wrote: An excellent article on how severe neglect in infancy and early childhood effects some children, with the notable exception that RAD should never be used by adoptive parents as a "defense" against further abuses. Our family is struggling with this disorder in our daughter (now 11), adopted at five years old from foster care. I'm afraid we're all in for a long hard ride. Dad

((((((((Dad))))))))

Hang on and hold tight...know you're in my thoughts.

pb...

http://specialchildren.about.com/cs/radattachment/l/blloveisnot.htm Love Isn't Enough Reactive Attachment Disorder in Infancy and Early Childhood is a diagnosis used to describe the symptoms of children who have endured severe neglect. Neglect is defined as a disregard for the child's basic emotional needs for comfort, stimulation, and affection. Multiple primary caregivers make it virtually impossible to develop stable attachments. The affects can be devastating to the child. Bonding begins at birth. It encompasses the cycle of needs and having those needs met by a loving parent or caretaker. It's a cycle that is repeated a hundred times a day. An infant feels hunger, pain, or discomfort, thus crying out to have his needs met. In a healthy environment, the responsive parent will hold their infant, comfort him, and meet his needs. The child learns to trust; finding the world predictable and safe. The child who does not have his needs met, looks within himself, abruptly learning that the world is frightening and unpredictable. The bond is broken, the ability to trust is shattered. Can love for a child bring distress and pain to the child? Is it impossible for a child to become attached in a way that allows for intimacy in relationships? Have you met the child who will pay more attention to a stranger than show affection towards his/her parents? Superficial and charming become frightening descriptions of children diagnosed with RAD. Dreams are crushed as your home becomes a battleground. Newspaper headlines are telling the horror stories of adoptive families who have murdered their children. The family’s defense; Reactive Attachment Disorder. A disorder that can create such chaos in the child that the family is no longer able to cope with the stress or burden placed on them. One such family was promptly arrested and charged with child abuse, before they could leave their flight in New York. Officials removed their newly adopted four year old daughters (from Russia) right there on the airplane. Supporters for the family are stating that the girls are attachment disordered. Recently, an adoptive mother has been charged with allegedly attempting to sell her adopted daughter on the Internet. Once more, the defense places responsibility of the mother's actions on the fact that the daughter has an attachment disorder. Symptoms and Behaviors associated with R. A. D. Superficially engaging and charming. Lack of eye contact on parental terms. Indiscriminately affectionate with strangers. Not affectionate on parents' terms(not cuddly). Destructive to self, others and material things(accident prone). Cruelty to animals. Stealing. Lying about the obvious(crazy lying). No impulse controls (frequently acts hyperactive). Learning lags. Lack of cause and effect thinking. Lack of conscience. Abnormal eating patterns. Poor peer relationships. Preoccupation with fire. Persistent nonsense questions and incessant chatter. Inappropriately demanding and clingy. Abnormal speech patterns. Where to Seek Help and Guidance Treatment plans are available for children and families. One such therapy is holding therapy. Holding therapy involves forcibly holding the child by a qualified therapist who incites the child to rage. According to proponents of this type of therapy, this allows the child to acknowledge his/her rage, which is the key to the healing process. This particular therapy has been both praised and criticized as being too invasive to a child. Residential treatment is another option for families, one that I have personally chosen for my son, who suffers from a severe attachment disorder. Available Resources As the parent of children diagnosed with RAD, I do know first hand about the violence and devastation that is symptomatic of Reactive Attachment Disorder. I am available to answer your questions. Most importantly, I am here to offer support and friendship. You will find resources available to you in our library devoted to Attachment Disorders. Please don't hesitate to contact me. specialchildren.guide@about.com Previous Features

I'll echo what others have said: vent away Dad, that's what we're here
for.

Hugs

Linda

I'll echo what others have said: vent away Dad, that's what we're here
for.

Hugs

Linda